Love and harmony: A Malaysian mixed-race family’s journey through culture and respect
Respect, regardless of race or faith, is the foundation of unity and understanding.
Miracles have a way of weaving magic, especially when it comes to matters of fate. They unfold in the most unexpected ways, shaping lives in beautiful, unforeseen directions.
This is evident in the love story of Dr Siti Hajar Md Hanif, 38, who never imagined marrying her husband, assistant medical officer Iskandar Chai Yoong Sang, 34.
Hajar and Iskandar, who tied the knot on March 20, 2015, come from different cultural backgrounds. Iskandar is of Chinese and Indian descent, while Hajar is Malay, and together they represent a beautiful blend of Malaysia’s multiracial society, embodying love and respect in their family journey.
Their family’s story gained public attention last October when Dr Siti Hajar shared a TikTok video, showcasing her mixed-race family, with her mother-in-law lovingly caring for her child. The video captured the essence of love and harmony between the three races.
The clip amassed 3.5 million views, with many praising Dr Siti Hajar for her close bond with her mother-in-law and in-laws, despite their differences in religion.
RESPECT BINDS PEOPLE TOGETHER REGARDLESS OF RACE AND RELIGION
Hajar said that mutual respect is essential for maintaining peace in Malaysia's diverse society. She believes that respect, regardless of race or faith, is the foundation of unity and understanding.
"It's something to learn and explore, allowing us to embrace and respect each other's cultures while enjoying them, as long as it doesn't contradict with our religion.
“Respect and kindness should be the foundation for harmony among all of us,” she said when contacted recently.
She said that the key to their harmony is accepting each other's cultures and adapting to them, while being careful not to interfere with religious matters, which she considers a sensitive issue.
Hajar finds joy in blending their Malay, Indian, and Chinese cultures through food, clothing, and customs, creating a truly multicultural family environment.
Culturally, Hajar believes it's important to learn and explore each other's traditions. For example, she keeps chopsticks at home for her father-in-law, ensures her husband and children celebrate various cultural festivities by dressing them in traditional attire for Chinese New Year, Deepavali, and Hari Raya, and introduces Malay customs like teaching her kids to ‘salam’ with her in-laws, a new experience for them.
"Having a multiracial family is beautiful because it allows you to experience different cultures, beliefs, and the opportunity to learn respect for each other.
“As long as we embrace cultural differences and avoid sensitive issues like religion, living in harmony is possible,” she added.
She emphasised that after joining her mixed-race family, she now celebrates Chinese New Year in addition to Hari Raya, learning new traditions like decorating the house and respecting customs such as not sweeping the floor during the festivities.
Her husband, in turn, has embraced Hari Raya by trying traditional dishes, joining prayers, and together they teach their children multiple languages to help them communicate with their grandparents.
She stressed that her family is unique for its strength in uniting three different races and religions, emphasising that acceptance of diverse cultures is achievable through mutual respect and avoiding sensitive religious issues.
While language can be a challenge, she said that food, celebrations, traditional attire, and cultural beliefs pose no significant barriers as long as they don’t conflict with religious practices.
“I’m very thankful to have actually a very loving family and also in-laws who do not judge and also do not discriminate against any of us despite being of different races and religions,” she added.
She pointed out that growing up in a diverse neighbourhood with mixed cultures and races, her siblings have always interacted with friends from various backgrounds and attended schools with different ethnicities and religions.
Hajar and her family have effortlessly embraced the diversity within their household. Her children, raised to honour and respect their grandparents of different faiths, greet them warmly, shake hands, and learn the unique traditions that shape their multicultural family.
Together with her husband, Hajar is raising three children Yusuf Naufal, 6, Yasmin Alina, 4, and Yunus Anaqi, 2, in a home where love, respect, and understanding are at the heart of their upbringing.
This beautiful blend of cultures and values has created a harmonious family that reflects the spirit of Malaysia's unity in diversity.
