Don't ignore the red flags in a relationship, a survivor’s message to all men

SHAH ALAM - Hishammuddin Naeem Badrulhisham was 15 when he was in a relationship with his ex-girlfriend who was emotionally abusive towards him.

Sharing his bitter memories of being a victim of abuse, the 25-year old who hails from Shah Alam said no one should tolerate such treatment in their lives.

He said he was not physically abused in the relationship which lasted for about three years, but he was abused emotionally throughout the period.

Hishammuddin said his former lover would always get other men involved in the relationship and comparing them to him.

This, he said had caused him serious emotional damage.

He said it did not occur to him that there was a red flag in the relationship although he had known the women for a total of six years.

“I did not consider it as a red flag nor did i think about ending the relationship.

“I am the guy in the relationship, so I try my best to make my girlfriend happy regardless of how she reacts.

“It does not matter if she is throwing a fit or gallivanting with another man. So, in some sense I held some level of responsibility to that,” he said on Sinar Daily's talkshow Relatable, titled ‘Women Who Abuse: Why?’, today.

Sending a message to all men, Hishammuddin said abuse is not normal and it should not be something normal.

He advised those who went through a similar experience to move on.

“When you are in love, you are dumb, but you should not tolerate abuse in your life.

“Move on. There will always be someone better for you,” he said.