WASHINGTON - The choices Dr Razan Al-Nahhas was faced with daily in Gaza could not have been more dire as she sought to treat wave after wave of injured Palestinians.
The emergency medicine physician said her colleagues attempted to prepare her for the grim realities that she was to encounter on her five-week volunteer tour, but said in an interview with Anadolu that nothing could have braced her for what she encountered.
"There's no way to really, truly express the emotions, the trauma that you feel in that moment, seeing family members just devastated, crying over the bodies of their children, their family, their relatives. There was no way they could have prepared me for that, as much as they tried to.
"Just the feeling of almost hopelessness that you have when you're there, because you see these patients, and you so desperately want to treat them and take care of them, and you know that you can't," Al-Nahhas recalled.
Al-Nahhas recalled being forced to decide which patients would be provided with life-saving care amid the "sheer number of casualties" that were flowing into Aqsa al-Shuhada in Deir al-Balah amid relentless Israeli bombardment and aid restrictions that forced medical facilities to operate on a patchwork basis.
"As healthcare providers, we should be caring for every single patient, but with the limited resources and just the sheer number of casualties, you're put in this position where you have no choice, and that's a feeling that I had never experienced before," she said.
"Now, as far as the aid getting delivered, it's not, it's not getting in. I mean, you know, it's a hit or miss. Some weeks are better than others. But even when the aid does get in, it is just the bare minimum," she added.
Over 44,700 people have been killed in Gaza since Israel launched its war on the coastal enclave in response to the Hamas-led Oct 7, 2023 operation. The UN estimates that 70 per cent of the Palestinian dead have been women and children. Over 100,000 others have been injured.
Some 1,200 people were killed in the Oct 7 attack and 250 others were taken back to Gaza as hostages. Roughly 100 remain there.
Last month, the International Criminal Court (ICC) issued arrest warrants for Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and former Defence Minister Yoav Gallant for war crimes and crimes against humanity committed by Israeli forces in Gaza, the start of a process that is expected to take years to play out.
Asked about the court's action, al-Nahhas said she feels a personal obligation to offer her testimony to the ICC "the limited number of people that have gone and have been eyewitness to this genocide."
"They're not allowing foreign press. They're not allowing investigators. They're not allowing really, truly, anyone in to witness this, so the few of us that have entered, it is our duty, and it's our obligation to provide testimony, and I absolutely would want to do that," she said.
In the US, the Biden administration has lashed out at the ICC following its decision to issue, saying it was an "outrageous" act and vowing to maintain what President Joe Biden has called Washington's "ironclad" commitment to Israel's security.
The administration similarly dismissed findings from Amnesty International, which said last week that it had found "sufficient basis to conclude that Israel has committed and is continuing to commit genocide against Palestinians in Gaza."
Hala Rharrit, a former State Department spokesperson, who spoke at a press conference alongside Al-Nahhas, acknowledged that many politicians have been "unmoved" by mounting evidence that Israel is committing genocide in Gaza, attributing it to the pervasiveness of special interest groups in Washington.
"Our politicians no longer vote based on what their constituents are demanding. They no longer vote on what is good for America," she said.
"These decisions are not being made on what is keeping America safer, what is advancing US interests. They're being made based on who's going to get me elected, which donors do I need to answer to? And that's what's driving decision making, and that's what's absolutely dangerous for the American people," she added. - ANADOLU AGENCY