KLANG - Imagine a life where your identity clashes with your faith. This is the reality Syahrin Rashidi and Muhammad Azri faced as former members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community seeking to embrace Islam.
Their stories are a powerful testament to the power of inner strength, unwavering belief, and the importance of a supportive community.
Seeking Harmony: From Transition to Transformation
Syahrin, 59, embarked on a path of transition years ago. But a dissonance lingered. He yearned for spiritual alignment and found it in a renewed commitment to his faith.
"Education plays a crucial role here, we should refrain from criticism and condemnation towards LGBT individuals.
"Simultaneously, members of the LGBT community should prioritise their akhlak (manners),” he told Sinar Daily in an interview recently.
26 years ago, Syahrin said that he began taking hormone pills to transition to a more feminine identity and initially, he was not fully comfortable with it.
"However, I said to myself that this is who I am and cannot be changed. Internally, I felt a spiritual alignment with this identity.
"Most of the time, people are unsure of my gender based on my appearance and voice, often mistaking me for a woman during phone calls, particularly with bank personnel.
"This challenge was a consequence of my old identity. Whenever I had business with banks, I had to physically visit the bank to conduct transactions face-to-face because they doubted my identity over the phone.
"On one occasion at the National Mosque, I was in the men's prayer area when a security guard approached me, questioning my gender. Another guard joined in, also unsure.
"They asked me to show my identification card (IC) to confirm my gender. This incident occurred in the front row of the men's prayer section, visible to other visitors,” he added.
However, Syahrin said that he did not mind because the security guards were just doing their job to verify his identity.
"When people discuss those who have ‘migrated' and repented, we often hear many stories, but maintaining consistency is challenging.
"Remaining istiqamah (steadfast) requires constant reminders of Allah from friends and environments. Without this support, it becomes difficult to stay on track.
"You may engage in good deeds at the mosque, but returning to old friends can lead to drifting away again. That is why it is crucial to surround ourselves with ulama (Islamic scholars) and devout individuals who reinforce our faith and prevent us from being ‘lost’ again,” he added.
Syahrin also stressed sincerity, noting that one should perform good deeds solely for Allah's sake, not for praise or recognition from others.
Beyond Criticism: Finding Strength in Sincerity
In a related matter, Azri, a 58-year-old man who is also a former LGBT individual, shared a similar sentiment, citing how negative opinions mattered little when his heart was focused on repentance.
He found acceptance and even professional respect in the long run.
"There were others who viewed individuals like me as an insult to manhood and Islam.
"I paid little attention to their opinions because my intentions were sincere, and I made every effort to seek repentance. Let them say what they want.
"Alhamdulillah today, those who speak ill of me or hold negative views are a minority compared to those who treat me well. Ironically, those who once belittled or mistreated me later sought my help or professional expertise.
"As they worked alongside me, they discovered that despite my ‘soft’ demeanour that differs from typical masculine traits, I am a kind-hearted person who is considerate, hardworking and is simply enjoyable to be around,” he added.